


You're Crashing, But You're No Wave

by chronicpunkanxiety



Category: Cobra Starship, Fall Out Boy, Gym Class Heroes, My Chemical Romance, Panic! at the Disco, The Academy Is..., The Used
Genre: Alternate Universe - High School, Anorexia, Anxiety, Bipolar Disorder, Bulimia, Eating Disorders, M/M, Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Self-Esteem Issues, Self-Harm, Suicide Attempt, Trans Male Character, and gabe n joe speak yiddish, bert mccracken is not an asshole, gabe n ray speak spanish, he also has dreads, i refuse to villainize him, most of this is based on my own experiences, pete's a soccer player, vent fic, yes joe is trans in this
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-11-26
Updated: 2020-12-16
Packaged: 2021-03-09 19:35:05
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Rape/Non-Con
Chapters: 5
Words: 7,362
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27721505
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chronicpunkanxiety/pseuds/chronicpunkanxiety
Summary: hang on a rope or a baited breathwhichever you prefer
Relationships: Andy Hurley/Joe Trohman, Frank Iero/Gerard Way, James Dewees/Ray Toro, Jepha Howard/Dan Whitesides, Mikey Way/Pete Wentz, Quinn Allman/Bert McCracken, William Beckett/Gabe Saporta
Kudos: 11





	1. Get Busy Living

It was late September when they first ran into each other. Mikey was on his way to find Frank, who was usually smoking by the fields used for soccer practices. He was looking at his cellphone and managed to walk right into another person. When he looked up, he realized it was Pete Wentz, star soccer player. The smaller boy looked surprised.  
“Oh, sorry,” Mikey said. Pete shook his head, his dreadlocks swinging in his face.  
“It’s alright,” he said, his light Chicago drawl contrasting with Mikey’s thicker New Jersey accent.   
“I’ve gotta go, sorry for running into you,” Mikey explained.  
“See you later, Mikey Way,” Pete said, running off in the direction of where the soccer team was warming up.   
As Mikey made his way to where Frank likely was, he replayed the conversation in his mind. How did he know his name?

___

It was a week or so later when they spoke again. Mikey was getting a couple textbooks out of his locker when he heard a familiar voice shout his name down the hall. He brushed his hair out of his eyes and pushed up his glasses.   
“Hey?” he asked. Pete bounded up to him, grinning like a maniac.   
“Hi Mikey Way!” he said. Mikey looked at him with confusion.  
“Are you okay?” Mikey questioned. Pete nodded enthusiastically.   
“Wanna have lunch together?” he asked. Mikey weighed his options. He could sit with Pete and his friends, but he’d be leaving Frank alone. Then again Frank also had Dewees and Jepha and Ray to sit with, so it wouldn’t be too much of a tragedy.  
He nodded, causing Pete’s grin to get impossibly bigger. Pete threw his arms around Mikey, hugging him close before running off.   
Mikey stood dumbfounded in the crowded hallway.

“So let me get this straight. Pete fucking Wentz knows your name, and he invited you to have lunch with him and hugged you in the middle of the hallway. But you’ve never talked to him before?” Frank asked on the way to their shared math class.   
“The only time I talked to him was when I accidentally ran into him on my way to find you like a week ago.”  
“Weren’t you fucking his best friend?”  
“Just because I was fucking Gabe Saporta doesn’t mean I ever talked to Pete. It wasn’t like we were dating, it was just sex. Besides, he’s dating William Beckett now.”  
“Did he at least have a big dick?” Frank asked. Mikey shoved him.  
“Fuck off, Iero. Aren’t you still trying to get into my brother’s pants?”  
“Correction: I did get into your brother’s pants,” Frank stated smugly. Mikey made a disgusted face.  
“That’s disgusting and I never want to hear that again. Jesus fucking Christ, Frank.”  
“Do you want me to tell Gerard that you got dicked down in the back of his car? Because I will,” Frank threatened.  
“You wouldn’t!”   
The bell rang, and they were still a small distance away from their class. Frank swore and started running, Mikey following close behind.  
“Mr. Iero, Mr. Way, you’re late,” Ms. Locklear said. “Sit down.”  
They spent the class playing tic-tac-toe and ignoring Ms. Locklear’s lecture on some random algebra theory. 

___

“Mikey Way!” Pete shouted as he ran down the hall towards Mikey, who was putting his things in his locker.   
“Hey, Pete,” he greeted. “What’s up?”  
“Are you still coming to lunch?” he asked, wrapping his arms around Mikey’s thin waist.   
“Uh, yeah? Are you alright?”  
“I’m fantastic!” Pete exclaimed.   
Mikey allowed Pete to drag him into the cafeteria to the table where his friends sat. Gabe Saporta, William Beckett, Andy Hurley, Patrick Stump, and Joe Trohman were already there.   
“Guys, this is Mikey! Isn’t he pretty?” Pete said, pulling Mikey into the seat next to him. Gabe flashed a smile at him.   
Patrick leaned towards Mikey and gave him a tight smile.  
“Pete’s in a manic episode right now, if you’re wondering. That’s why he’s acting like this,” he whispered. Mikey nodded in understanding. It happened to Mikey sometimes too, but it was less often now as he was on medication. His depressive episodes were always worse, ending in a few hospital stays and some new scars.  
“Is he bipolar?” Mikey questioned.  
“Yeah, but don’t tell him I told you,” Patrick said.   
“Cool, I am too,” he replied. Patrick smiled, thankfulness in his eyes.   
Pete, in his manic state, didn’t notice that Mikey wasn’t eating. William kept glancing at him, concern in his eyes. Mikey watched Pete mess with Joe’s hair, earning a playful slap on the arm from him.  
“Is that kosher?” Gabe asked, pointing at some food on Joe’s tray.  
“Honestly, I have no idea,” Joe replied.   
Gabe said something in what Mikey assumed was Yiddish, causing Joe to throw a grape at him.   
“Shuddup you Uruguayan bitch,” he hissed. “Don’t bring the Talmud into this.”  
Joe threw another grape, and Gabe fell backwards out of his chair, loudly cursing in Spanish.  
“Watch your language, Gabe,” Ray said from a table over. Mikey had forgotten Ray spoke Spanish as well (he worked at a bodega with Gabe, of course he knew Spanish).   
Frank looked over at Mikey and gave him a thumbs-up, to which the taller boy responded with a middle finger.   
“You guys are annoying. I’m going to find Travie,” Patrick sighed.  
“Tell your boyfriend I said hi!” Pete called, earning a middle finger from Patrick’s retreating figure. 

___

On Saturday, Mikey walked to the little bodega downtown with Frank and Gerard (who was home for the weekend). They were going to visit Ray and try to sweet-talk free coffee from him.  
When the door was opened they were hit with the smell of coffee and the sweet bread Mrs. Toro often baked and sold.  
“Hey guys,” Ray called from behind the counter.   
“What’s up, Toro?” Gerard said, walking up to the counter while dragging Frank behind him.  
“Nothing much. Watching the store while trying to make sure Gabe doesn’t die while stocking.”  
“I’m not going to die while stocking, bitch!” Gabe yelled from across the bodega. The taller boy made his way over to Mikey.  
“Hey Mikey, have you heard from Pete in the past couple days?” he asked.  
“No? Why?” Gabe shook his head, eyes downcast.  
“I’m worried about him, man. I hope he’s alright,” Gabe whispered. Mikey hadn’t ever seen Gabe so vulnerable.   
“We… we could check on him? Make sure he’s okay?” Mikey suggested. Gabe looked up, a small smile on his face.  
“We could. He seems to have really taken a liking to you.”  
“Alright, I’m gonna go tell G and Frank.”

The drive to Pete’s house was spent in silence. Mikey could tell that Gabe was nervous. They passed into the nicer neighborhood on the other side of town, eventually pulling into the driveway of a nice house. It was a big home, bigger than Mikey’s home. Mikey followed Gabe to the front doorstep. The taller boy knocked and the door was answered by a girl who was slightly younger than them and was a bit darker than Pete.   
“Hi Gabe,” she greeted.  
“Heya Hilary. Is Pete upstairs?”  
“Yeah. He hasn’t left his room in a few days.” Hilary sighed. “Help him out, yeah, Gabe?”  
“Gracias, mamacita,” Gabe thanked, pulling Mikey up the stairs to a door at the end of the hall.


	2. Or Get Busy Dying

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: suicide attempt

Neither Gabe or Mikey were possibly prepared for the sight that greeted them when they opened Pete’s door. They found the boy in his attached bathroom, sitting in his empty bathtub, clutching an empty pill bottle. He had fresh red cuts running up and down his bare arms. They were on top of layers of old scars. Gabe gasped and swore loudly in Spanish, quickly kneeling next to the tub, grabbing towels to wrap around Pete’s wrists. He looked up, tears shining in his eyes, and told Mikey to get Hilary and tell her to call an ambulance.   
Mikey ran downstairs, and located Hilary in the kitchen.   
“Hilary! Follow me, Pete’s in trouble,” he said quickly. Fear flashed across her face and she was hot on his heels when he ran upstairs. She let out a strangled cry when she saw the state of her older brother. She quickly dialed 911 and told them to come quickly.   
Pete was barely conscious, his eyelashes fluttering over his unfocused eyes. Mikey picked up the pill bottle. Ativan. 

___

“Mikey? What’s wrong?” Gerard’s worried voice came through the phone.   
“I’m at the hospital,” he replied, tears staining his voice.  
“What?!”  
“I’m fine… it’s Pete, Pete tried to kill himself.”

___

Gerard showed up in the waiting room and Mikey was curled up in a chair, staring blankly at the floor. Gabe was on the other side, having a hurried conversation with someone in Spanish. Hilary sat a couple chairs away from Mikey and was on the phone with her parents.  
“Mikey?” Gerard asked, kneeling in front of his baby brother.   
“He almost died. He downed a whole bottle of Ativan. They… they had to pump his stomach.”  
Gerard gathered his brother in a tight hug.   
“It’s okay, he’s gonna be okay, it’ll be fine.”   
Gabe sighed loudly and hung up on whoever he was talking to.   
“I have to go. My dad wants me home to watch my brother,” he said to Mikey and Hilary. Hilary nodded, she was still on the phone with her parents, who were in Chicago at the moment.   
As soon as Gabe left, Mikey broke down and started crying into Gerard’s shoulder.   
“Hilary Wentz?” a doctor called into the waiting room. Hilary stood quickly, saying a goodbye and hanging up the phone.  
“How is my brother?” she asked.   
“He’s sedated, we pumped his stomach and cleaned his wrists. He isn’t conscious but you can see him.”  
Hilary nodded.   
“Mikey? Wanna come?” she asked. Mikey wiped his eyes and nodded, telling Gerard to wait for him. 

___

He was so, so pale. His skin wasn’t his normal dark tanned tone. He looked like a corpse. The shallow rise and fall of his chest and the consistent beeping of the heart rate monitor signified that he was alive.   
Hilary let out a broken sob at the sight of her brother. She sought the comfort of a hug from Mikey. He held the crying girl to his chest, knowing that seeing her brother like this must be causing unimaginable heartache.   
“My parents should be here any time now,” Hilary mumbled. As if on cue, Dale and Peter arrived in the hospital room. Upon seeing Pete in the bed, Dale burst into tears.   
“My baby,” she whimpered, grabbing Pete’s hand.   
“Hilary… how did this happen?” Peter asked.  
“Pete was in one of his slumps and Mikey and Gabe came over and discovered that he downed his entire bottle of Ativan and cut his wrists,” Hilary replied, tears still staining her voice.   
Dale let out a desperate wail. Peter had silent tears running down his face.   
“We shouldn’t have left him,” Dale whispered, “I knew he was in a depressive episode. I didn’t think he’d try this.”

“Ma?” Pete’s tired voice asked. Dale’s head shot up, as did the rest of those in the room.   
“Pete! Baby, you’re awake!” Dale cried out, wrapping her son in a hug.   
“I’m so, so sorry,” Pete whispered.   
“For what, son?” his dad questioned.  
“For being a burden. For being a failure. I’m sorry. I tried- I tried to make it so all of you wouldn’t have to deal with me anymore.” 

___

Pete was released on Sunday night. He asked Mikey to stay with him as he was scared of being alone. Mikey helped him up the stairs, as he was still sore from getting his stomach pumped. Pete collapsed on his bed and crawled under the blankets.   
“Can you lay with me?” Pete asked, his voice small and nervous. Mikey nodded, climbing under the covers next to him. The smaller boy immediately cuddled up to him.  
“Mikes?”  
“Yeah?”  
“Why are you so bony?”   
Mikey’s heart stopped for a moment.   
“I’m really not. I’m honestly too big,” he whispered.  
“You’re all skin and bones, Mikey Way.”   
Mikey shook his head and wrapped his arms around Pete. Mikey buried his face in Pete’s hair, listening to the other boy’s breathing slow and eventually falling asleep. 

___

“I’m gonna cut my hair,” Pete said in the middle of breakfast. Dale looked up, confusion evident in her eyes.  
“Why?” she asked. “I’m sick of the dreads. I’m gonna cut them off and let my hair grow out more,” he said, picking at the bandages around his wrists.  
“Alright, baby,” Dale said. “Mikey, would you mind helping him?”  
“Yeah, I can help him,” Mikey mumbled. He was picking at his pancakes, dread evident on his face.   
Pete mouthed “are you okay?” at Mikey, who nodded. Mikey’s phone began vibrating and he left the room to answer it, explaining it was his brother.   
As soon as he was out of earshot, Dale turned to her son.  
“Pete, have you seen Mikey eat recently? He’s so skinny and hasn’t even touched his breakfast.”  
“No, Ma, and I’m worried. Do you… do you think he has an eating disorder?”   
“I don’t know… you should talk to his brother, see if he knows anything about it.”

___ 

Mikey invited Pete over to his house that weekend. Gerard was once again home from college, and was sitting in the kitchen drinking coffee and smoking. Mikey was still upstairs changing.  
“Hey Pete,” Gerard said, taking a drag.  
“Hi Gerard.” Pete paused. “Can I ask you something?”  
“Sure, shoot.”  
“Does… does Mikey have an eating disorder?”  
Gerard blanched.   
“Oh god. I thought- I thought he stopped. He- he was anorexic in freshman year. Oh my god. I- I knew it would impact him when I left for art school, but I didn’t think he’d relapse.”   
Pete’s stomach dropped. 

The conversation was cut off by Mikey making an appearance in the kitchen. He wore a Joy Division shirt that hung off his thin frame and a pair of slightly loose skinny jeans. His glasses were shoved haphazardly on his face and a black denim jacket was thrown over his shirt.   
“Hey Pete,” Mikey greeted.   
“Heya Mikey Way.”  
Mikey led Pete up into his room, and they sat on Mikey’s bed together.   
Pete turned to Mikey, not realizing he was leaning in until he was about an inch away from Mikey’s lips. 

And then he closed the gap.


	3. There's A Light On In Chicago

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> TW: discussion of rape

Mikey froze for a moment, and then kissed back, their lips moving in synch. He allowed Pete to climb into his lap, his hands tangled into Mikey’s light brown hair. Mikey placed his hands on Pete’s lower back.   
They broke apart, panting lightly.   
Mikey’s dark hazel eyes met Pete’s whisky colored ones.   
“Do you… do you wanna be my boyfriend?” Pete breathed out. Mikey nodded feverishly, eagerly pressing his lips to the other boy’s again. 

___

“So… I have a soccer game on Friday,” Pete said.   
“Are you asking me if I wanna come?”   
“Uh, yes?”  
“Of course I will, baby. I gotta show off that my boyfriend is the captain of the soccer team,” Mikey replied, kissing Pete’s cheek. The darker boy blushed.   
“I love you,” Pete whispered.   
“I love you too.”

___

“You’re dating Pete fucking Wentz?!” Frank yelled. Dewees, Jepha, and Ray turned to the two.   
“You’re what?!” Dewees asked.  
“Oh, fuck off, James. You’ve been caught making out with Ray too many times to get an opinion.”  
Ray blushed scarlet, Jepha cackling next to him.   
“Shuddup! I’m going to Mr. Hudson’s class, follow if you want, James,” Ray said, standing and pulling on his bag. Dewees got up and trailed after Ray, leaving Frank, Jepha, and Mikey at the table.

___

It was Friday, and Mikey sat in the front row of the bleachers that overlooked the soccer field. He pulled Pete’s letterman jacket on tighter, shivering in the early November evening chill. After the game they were going to have a get together at Pete’s house.  
Mikey watched Pete run across the field as he was a forward, managing to kick goal after goal.   
The game ended with a score of 10-1. Mikey ran down   
the bleacher steps to where the teams were coming off the field, tackling Pete in a hug. Pete stumbled but held on to the taller boy.   
“Heya Mikes,” Pete greeted, grinning. Mikey didn’t reply, instead opting to press a sweet kiss to Pete’s lips. Pete kissed back deeper, ignoring the wolf-whistles from his teammates.   
“I think you look hot as fuck in my letterman jacket,” Pete breathed against Mikey’s lips. 

___

Pete, Mikey, and their friends gathered in Pete’s living room. Hilary was over at a friend’s house and their parents were in Chicago again.   
“Alright, truth or dare, Frank?” Mikey asked. Frank snorted.  
“What are we, twelve?” Frank asked. “Truth.”  
“Is it true you got fucked by my brother on our living room couch?” Mikey asked. Frank turned red.   
“Uh… yes.” Mikey slapped his arm.  
“Remind me to never sit on that couch again, nasty ass-“  
“Okay! Ray, truth or dare?” Frank yelled, cutting Mikey off.   
“Dare.”  
“I dare you to make out with Dewees.”  
“Fine,” the taller boy said. He climbed onto James’ lap, and pressed his lips to the other’s. They deepened the kiss, James threading his fingers through Ray’s thick hair.   
“Whoa, whoa, whoa! No fucking on my living room floor!” Pete intervened. Ray and James broke apart, Ray grinning as he turned to the rest of the group. His eyes landed on Gabe.   
“Te reto a deshacer los pantalones de Guillermo con los diente,” Ray told him.   
“Maldito hijo de puta,” Gabe hissed.  
“I don’t understand anything either of you said but a dare’s a dare, Gabe,” Pete said. Gabe groaned.  
“I dared him to undo William’s pants with his teeth,” Ray explained. William blushed.   
Gabe rolled his eyes and leveled his face with William’s waist, using his teeth to pull the belt apart. He struggled with the button and managed the zipper.  
William covered his face with his hands, not so much embarrassed that Gabe was doing that but that it was in front of everyone else.  
“Alright, bitches! Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz the third! Truth or dare?!” Gabe yelled. Mikey snickered.  
“Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz the third? That’s seriously your full name?”   
“Shuddup, Mikes,” Pete said, throwing a pillow at him. “I choose truth!”  
“Is it true that you fucked some college guy at a frat party?” Gabe asked. Pete’s smile dropped.  
“I-I don’t wanna talk about that,” Pete said, curling into Mikey’s side and hiding his face.   
“Good fucking going Saporta.” Travie whacked Gabe with a throw pillow.   
Mikey ran his hands through Pete’s hair.   
“You good?” he whispered. Pete nodded.  
“I-I’ll tell you later.”

___

That night, Mikey and Pete were laying in Pete’s bed. Mikey’s limbs were wrapped around the shorter boy.  
“When… when I was a freshman, I went to a frat party at Northwestern in Evanston. This… this guy, I think he was a senior in college, had given me some drink. I didn’t- I didn’t know that he had slipped roofies into it,” Pete cut himself off with a strangled sob.  
“It’s okay, you’re okay,” Mikey whispered.  
“He took me upstairs… I didn’t- I didn’t want to. He held me down, and then I passed out halfway through. I was only fourteen, he had to have been around 21.”  
“He… he drugged and raped you?”   
Pete began sobbing loudly.   
“I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” Pete cried. Mikey was confused.  
“Why- Why are you sorry?”   
“I’m dirty, I’m ruined, I’m a no-good goddamn waste-of-space that should never have been born-“  
“Hey, hey! No! You are amazing and I love you, Pete. That man hurt you in one of the worst ways possible. You’re a great person, you can’t define your self-worth by what he did to you. You can’t give him that power over you.”   
Pete was silent for a moment and then turned to the taller boy.  
“I love you, Mikey.”  
“I love you too. So, so much.”

___

“Guess what’s in two weeks, bitches!” Gabe yelled as he sat down at their lunch table.  
“Homecoming?” Joe asked.  
“Hell yes! The night to get shitfaced and then fuck your date after the dance!”   
“I thought that was prom?” Ray asked.   
“Both! And since this sacred night is coming soon, I’d like to formally ask Mr. William Eugene Beckett to homecoming!” Gabe said. William blushed.  
“Your… your middle name is Eugene?” Pete asked, giggling.  
“Oh, shut your trap, Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz!”  
“Dude, Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz is my grandpa. I’m Peter Lewis Kingston Wentz the third.”  
“Shut it! Anyway, Gabe, I will go to homecoming with you.”  
“Hey, Pete, wanna go to homecoming with me?” Mikey asked.  
“Of course, dumbass.”

___

Mikey was hanging out in Gerard’s dorm room. Two of Gerard’s friends were also there, lounging on his roommate’s bed. The bald one, Grant, was laying upside down reading a comic book. The other one, Bert, was sitting next to them, scrolling on his phone.  
“Why the FUCK is art so hard?!” Gerard yelled in frustration, throwing down his pencil. Grant raised an eyebrow.   
“Because it’s art?” they replied.   
“You’re in art school, dumbass, you should know,” Bert adds.  
“I’m gay and stupid!” Gerard yelled, thumping his forehead onto the desk.   
“Neither of us have braincells either! I’m a dumb bisexual and they’re a nonbinary with no brain!” Bert exclaimed, pointing at Grant.  
“We know, Bert. Grant’s head is empty. If you knocked on it, it’d probably sound hollow.”  
“Shut up, you dumb slut,” Grant said, throwing a pillow at Gerard.  
“Says the one who has been sleeping with everyone in their art class.”  
“You’re fucking your brother’s best friend!”  
“I’m fucking my roommate!”  
“We know, Bert!”   
Bert shrugged. He talked about fucking Quinn, his roommate, too much for them to not know.   
Mikey liked Gerard’s friends. They were just as dumb and fucked up as his own.  
Grant was a Scottish transfer student who drowned his sorrows in one night stands. Bert was a disowned former mormon battling bulimia.  
Basically, Grant couldn’t keep it in their pants and Bert couldn’t keep it in his stomach.  
Mikey didn’t actually know if he’d seen Bert eat before. He’s seen the man drink water plenty but he never ate in front of Mikey. It was probably because he didn’t want to be a bad influence by immediately throwing it up.  
Too bad Bert didn’t know how similar they really were.


	4. You're A Hot Mess And I'm Falling For You

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> my first smut

“Where’s Gee?” Mikey asked his mom on Saturday afternoon. Usually his brother would be home by now. “He’s at the hospital,” she replied, not faltering from the laundry she was folding.   
“What?!” Mikey asked. Gerard was at the hospital?  
“Don’t worry, he’s fine,” she explained. “It’s Bert. I don’t know what happened to him, he didn’t say.”  
Mikey left the room and called Gerard.  
“Hello?”  
“Gerard! What happened to Bert?”  
“He collapsed and wouldn’t wake up. They said it’s because he’s really underweight. He- he’s only 111 pounds.”  
“Jesus Christ. Is he gonna be okay?”  
“His body is in bad shape. You know how he’s bulimic, right? He had to have a feeding tube put in and an IV. He hasn’t woken up yet but he should soon.”   
“Oh- okay. Keep me updated, yeah?”  
“Can do. Make sure to eat something today. I love you.”  
“I love you too.”

___

Gabe was worried. William was getting thinner and thinner each day and was shutting Gabe out.  
“Bilvy?” Gabe asked as they were laying together on William’s bed.   
“Yeah, Gabanti?”   
“You’d tell me if anything was wrong, right?”   
“Of course, baby. Why d’you ask?”   
“I’m just worried. You keep getting skinnier and it feels like you’re icing me out. I don’t want to be shut out so you can hurt yourself.”  
“I-I’m not hurting myself, I’m just trying to be lighter.”  
Gabe caught William’s wrists in his hand. He tried not to grimace at just how small they were.  
“Bilvy, mi amor, look at me,” he began, making William meet his eyes. “You are all skin and bones. I love you, I will always love you, and I want to help you. But this isn’t healthy.”  
“120,” William whispered.  
“What?”  
“My- my weight. It’s 120.”  
Gabe internally winced. He didn’t really know what the healthy body weight should be, but he knew that 120 pounds was not healthy for a six foot four seventeen year old.  
“Te amo, Guillermo,” Gabe said, pressing a kiss to William’s forehead.  
“I love you too, Gabanti.”

___

On Monday, Gabe and Mikey were in English together. They were fucking around as their teacher, Mr. Rose, was next door arguing with Mr. Neil about something or another. Those two had a rivalry like none other in the school. According to the sounds of louder and increased arguing, other teachers -likely Mr. Sixx and Mr. Hudson- had joined the fray.   
Suddenly the classroom door banged open and an angry redheaded teacher burst in, followed by a calmer black-haired teacher.  
“Since Vince has decided to be a BITCH, I’m gonna let y’all do whatever you want this period as long as you don’t fuck up my classroom,” Mr. Rose huffed, his midwestern drawl becoming more prominent with his anger.   
“What Axl means,” Mr. Hudson said, “is that you have a study period because him and Vince can’t agree on a cohesive lesson plan.”  
“I hate that blonde bitch,” Mr. Rose muttered to Mr. Hudson.   
“Are you talking about Vince, Duff, or Steven?”  
“Shut up, Slash.”  
Mikey turned to Gabe, who was clearly entertained by their teacher’s antics.   
“What’re you smiling about, Gabey?”  
“The fact that every teacher in this school is chaos incarnate.” He paused. “Except for Mr. May and Mr. Mars.”  
“Oh! Gabe, I just had an amazing idea. You should convince William to wear a dress to homecoming,” Mikey suggested.  
“No, I would literally die on the spot. He’d be too hot, it would be unfair to every other person there.”  
“Tell ‘em that if he wears a dress to homecoming, I’ll wear a dress too.”  
“I always knew you would be a crossdresser.”“Shut the fuck up, Gabriel, and text William.”  
William’s response arrived a few minutes later.  
Tell Mikey that we’re going dress shopping after school.

___

Mikey allowed William to drag him into the mall up to the feminine stores that had good dresses.   
William held up a dark green sequined dress.  
“I think this would make Pete drool.”   
“No way, I look like shit in green.”  
“Shuddup. We’ll get you a little black dress, total Coco Chanel. Show off your legs, make Pete horny.”  
“I don’t want him spending the entirety of the dance with a boner, William.”  
“Okay, okay. Fine,” William sighed. He grabbed a long silky black dress from the rack and held it up. “What about this?”  
Mikey grinned. He took the dress from him and headed to the dressing room, William following.   
Mikey pulled on the dress, admiring how it slimmed him down and flowed past his long legs. The back of the dress was open, showing the upper half of his back.   
He opened the dressing room door. William gasped.  
“Holy fuck, Mikey. You look smokin’. Pete’s gonna fuckin’ love it!”  
Mikey blushed. He closed the door again and changed back into his clothes, holding onto the dress.  
William was looking at a long dark purple dress with a lace top.  
“Gabe’s favorite color is purple,” William said, noticing Mikey beside him.   
“Dude, he’s gonna die. It’s perfect.”  
They bought the dresses and wandered around the mall, stopping in front of Victoria’s Secret.   
“If Gabe saw you wearing lingerie under that dress he would fuck you into next week,” Mikey said, sensing William’s thoughts.   
“I could say the same about Pete.”  
Mikey rolled his eyes and pulled William into the store.

___

It was finally homecoming. Pete arrived at the Ways’ door, bearing a corsage and wearing a black suit. Mikey descended the stairs in his dress and a pair of black kitten heels.   
When Pete saw him, his jaw dropped.  
“Holy shit,” he said. Mikey had convinced Gerard to do his makeup and he had on blood red lipstick with eyeliner.  
After Mikey’s parents had taken about a thousand photos of them, they went out to Pete’s car.   
At the dance, they saw William dancing with Gabe, who was looking at his date with nothing but love and lust. They said hello to Ray who was dancing with Dewees. Joe and Andy were spotted making out in a dark corner, while Patrick and Travie chatted nearby.  
The duo snickered to each other about the teachers who had been roped into chaperoning. Mr. Hudson was dancing with Mr. Rose. Mikey was fairly certain he saw Mr. Sixx sneak a kiss from Mr. Neil. Mr. McKagan and Mx. Stradlin were chatting by the punch.  
Mikey and Pete found a spot where they could dance with a fair amount of room.   
Pete’s whiskey colored eyes had nothing but love and adoration in them. The couple swayed in time to the music, Pete twirling Mikey, making him giggle. 

It was a little past midnight when they stumbled back to Pete’s car. They went back to Pete’s house as his parents were on a business trip and Hilary was staying at a friend’s house. They barely made it through the door before Pete attacked Mikey’s lips.   
Mikey whined, soft and high-pitched in his throat. Pete moved his lips down Mikey’s sharp jaw and thin neck. He bit and sucked at the soft skin of his collarbone.  
“Pete, please,” Mikey breathed.  
“Tell me what you want, baby.”   
“I want you to fuck me.” Pete growled and moved his hands to cup Mikey’s ass. They broke apart to stumble up to his bedroom. Mikey fell back against the soft mattress, while Pete began pulling off his suit. Once his shirt and jacket were off, he pounced on Mikey again.   
Their lips met in a bruising kiss. Mikey’s heels had been kicked off and his dress was riding up his legs. Pete ran his hands up his soft legs. Mikey pushed him away to pull the fabric up and over his head, collapsing against the bed again. Pete let out an almost inaudible whine upon realizing Mikey was wearing sheer black panties under the dress.   
Pete made quick work of getting his pants off, leaving only thin cotton between them.   
Pete’s lips wandered south, mouthing at his chest, brushing his calloused fingertips across his nipples. Mikey whimpered. His pupils were blown with lust. Pete’s lips finally found their way to the fabric of the panties. He grinned when Mikey sharply inhaled at the feeling of his hot breath on his aching cock. Pete pulled the panties down to free his boyfriend’s hard-on. He immediately went back down, kissing and sucking at the sensitive skin of his inner thighs, trailing his way back up to his cock. He swallowed it in one go.   
Mikey cried out at the feeling. It was so hot, so intense, so-  
Pete pulled away.   
“Pete, please, please, fuck me,” Mikey begged. Pete grinned and nodded, reaching into the drawer of his bedside table for lube and a condom.   
He slicked his fingers and, at Mikey’s encouragement, slipped his index finger inside his hole. Mikey whimpered at the intrusion but relaxed and whined when it began moving inside him.   
Pete added another finger, stilling, and then began moving and scissoring and fucking him with his fingers.  
He crooked his fingers, searching for that one specific spot-  
Mikey moaned loudly as Pete’s fingers rubbed against the bundle of nerves.  
Pete added a third finger and soon deemed Mikey stretched enough. The other boy was reduced to a writhing, moaning mess under him.   
Pete sat back, rolling on the condom, and slicking his cock. He moved and pressed the head to Mikey’s hole.  
He slowly pressed in, a long, drawn-out moan ripped from his lover’s throat.   
Once he was fully in, he waited for Mikey’s signal that he could move. Mikey nodded after a minute or so and Pete began thrusting. He sped up, each deep thrust hitting Mikey’s prostate with devastating accuracy.   
Mikey was getting close, he could tell, and so he started thrusting harder and deeper until he was fucking him into the mattress.   
It took only a few more strokes for Mikey to come, whining high in his throat, white fluid spurting from his untouched cock. Pete let go as well upon feeling Mikey tighten down on him, moaning into the crook of his neck.   
He pulled away, disposing of the condom, and laid back down on the bed with Mikey.  
“I love you, baby,” he said.  
“I’m gonna be limping for a week, but I love you too,” Mikey retorted. He shifted until he was in Pete’s arms, using his bare chest as a pillow. Soon, his breathing evened out, and he fell asleep with Pete following not long after.


	5. Liar Liar (Burn In Hell)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> CW: discussion of eating disorders, suicide attempts, scars, ocd, and body dysphoria.

Mikey entered his kitchen the next morning, trying to hide the limp he currently had thanks to Pete. Just his luck, Gerard was sitting at the table sipping coffee and texting someone. The older boy looked up, a smirk hinting at his lips.  
“Damn, Mikey, what did Pete’s dick do to you?” Gerard asked. Mikey flipped him off, limping upstairs with his heels in his hands, wearing his dress again and the remnants of his makeup. He went and showered, admiring the bruises on his hips and throat, and changed into an old Joy Division shirt and sweatpants.   
He went down and sat across from Gerard at the table.   
“Are you sure Pete isn’t a vampire?” Gerard asked, gesturing to the numerous hickeys.   
“How’s Bert?” Mikey asked, ignoring Gerard’s question.  
“He’s still in the hospital but he’s gonna be released soon. It’s gonna be on me and Grant to take care of him.”  
“Why don’t you stay here with him? It’s not too far from your school. It’d be easier to keep an eye on him here,” Mikey suggested. He wanted Bert to get better, he was a good guy and didn’t deserve to be sucked under by an eating disorder.  
“I’ll ask him. I’m going over to the hospital in a bit to check on him.”

____  
Gerard tried not to wince when he entered the hospital room. He would never get used to seeing his best friend in the white sheets with a feeding tube up his nose.  
“Wassup, G?” Bert greeted, setting down the comic book he was reading.   
“Hey, B. Have the doctors told you when you’re getting released?”  
“Tonight. It’s fucking embarrassing to have this thing up my nose. If this happened before I got kicked out my parents would’ve fuckin’ murdered me for it.”   
“How would ya feel about living with us for a while? The doctors say you gotta have supervision and we reckoned you could stay with us at our house.”  
“I don’t wanna be a burden. I can survive being in my dorm with Quinn and hanging out with you and Grant.”  
“Bert, man, I love ya, but that’s what landed you in the hospital in the first place. I don’t want to find you after you overdosed again or have you pass out again and cause more damage.”  
Bert had told them that when he was 16 he overdosed on sleeping pills. That was only a few months before he was kicked out. If it weren’t for his best friend, Adam, and being able to live with him, he would’ve never been able to make it to art school.  
“Is Mikey and your parents okay with it?” Bert asked.  
“They love you, man. They’re definitely cool with it.”

____

That night, the doctor went over with Gerard and his mom about how they have to keep an eye on him and make sure he eats and keeps it down. Grant came to bring Bert a change of clothes from his dorm.   
“C’mon Bert, we set up the foldout bed in in the basement for you. You have to share a room with Gerard but I assume that’s fine,” Mrs. Way said.  
“It’s alright,” Bert replied, running his hand through his greasy hair. He couldn’t wait to take a shower and sleep in a room that isn’t bright white and smelling of disinfectant.

____

Gerard woke up to the sound of crying. He sat up in his bed, realizing that Bert was writhing around on the pullout, tears on his face and sobs being wrenched from his throat. Gerard immediately jumps out of bed, going to his best friend and shaking him awake. Bert wakes with a start, fear in his eyes behind the tears.  
“Hey, it’s just me, you’re okay,” Gerard said softly. Bert launched himself into Gerard’s arms. He held onto him for dear life, sobbing into his shirt. “Do you wanna talk about it?”  
“I- I had a nightmare. About when I got kicked out,” Bert whimpered. Gerard’s heart clenched. Bert never told him the details of why he was disowned. “My dad- I hadn’t ever seen him so angry, he was yelling at me about how I was going to burn in hell because I’m bisexual, how my bulimia is just because I want attention- he couldn’t have his fucked up son ruining his picture-perfect Mormon reputation.”  
Gerard rubbed his back and whispered encouragement.   
“He called me a liar. He said I was lying about being depressed. Then he told me to pack my goddamn bags and get out of his house.”  
“Where was your mom?”  
“She was there, watching, not saying anything. Not trying to stand up for her son. She never did.”  
Gerard’s heart shattered.   
“It’s okay, you’re okay. They can’t hurt you anymore.”

____

That night, Pete was over for dinner at the Ways’. He sat in-between Mikey and Bert, and was holding his boyfriend’s hand under the table.   
Mrs. Way made spaghetti and garlic bread. Both Mikey and Bert were pushing their food around their plates. Pete leaned over to Mikey and squeezed his hand, giving him an encouraging smile.   
Mikey sighed and put a little bit of spaghetti in his mouth, chewing slowly, wanting to spit it out immediately.   
Meanwhile, Gerard was trying to coax Bert into eating.   
“C’mon B, just a few bites,” Gerard said softly. Bert shook his head, looking like he was about to cry.   
“I can’t, I can’t do it.”  
“I don’t want you to have to have a feeding tube again. Do it for me and Grant. For Quinn,” the older boy pleaded. Bert laughed bitterly.   
“Quinn doesn’t give a rat’s ass about me, Gerard. People never want me as a friend, just as a fuck. I think you and Grant are the only exceptions, and even they are only friends with me because of you.”  
“Bert, that’s not true. Grant loves you, man. I can’t vouch for Quinn’s dumbass, but I can for Grant. It would kill them to know that you don’t believe it.”  
Bert looked down, burning holes in his plate, unshed tears shining in his eyes.  
“I can’t- I can’t do it. I can’tIcan’tIcan’tIcan’tIcan’t,” he whispered.  
Pete was still leaning on Mikey’s shoulder, hands intertwined, while Mr. and Mrs. Way looked slightly uncomfortable at the sight in front of them.  
Bert was full-out sobbing now.   
“I- I want my family back. I’ll never fucking get them back, I can’t even talk to them. They changed their numbers,” he whimpered.  
Gerard sent a look to his parents that said, I’ll explain later.   
Bert’s cries tired him out, and he dozed off on Gerard’s shoulder. Gerard stood, lifting Bert bridal style and trying not to wince at how light his best friend was. He carried him downstairs, depositing him on the foldout and tucking him in. When he came back upstairs, Pete and Mikey had disappeared, so Gerard sat across from his parents at the table.  
“So, uh… Bert’s parents kicked him out when he was sixteen. He had to live with his friend Adam until he graduated. He doesn’t have any family anymore,” Gerard explained. Donna blanched.  
“Why… why did they kick him out?” she asked.   
“They hated that he was bisexual, said he was faking depression and his bulimia was only for attention. His- his dad told him he was going to burn in hell. They hated that he was ruining their perfect Mormon reputation,” he continued, burying his face in his hands. “A few months before they disowned him, he overdosed on sleeping pills.”   
“What the hell did they do to that kid?” Donald asked no one in particular. 

____

Mikey and Pete were laying on Mikey’s bed. They were curled up against each other, Mikey absently tracing the scars on Pete’s wrists.   
“I love you,” Pete said into Mikey’s shoulder. “I don’t deserve you.”  
“No, you don’t, you deserve so much better.”  
Pete sighed and nuzzled into the crook of his boyfriend’s neck. Mikey shivered slightly. Pete smiled and pressed a kiss to the pale skin there.   
“Babe, we can’t fuck with my parents downstairs,” Mikey said softly.   
“I’m tired anyway. Wanna take a nap with me?” Pete asked.  
Mikey agreed, pulling the comforter over the two of them, kissing Pete softly, before they both nodded off.

____

Pete woke up to his phone ringing. The caller ID said that it was Andy, so he picked up and muttered a hello.   
“Pete, I’m so fucking scared for Joe,” Andy’s trembling voice said.   
“Whoa, whoa, whoa. Back up. What happened to Joe?”  
“He hasn’t replied to any texts, and his OCD has been getting so bad recently, and I’m scared he’s gonna do something drastic.”  
“Andy, go to his house and check up on him. He’s probably fine, but we can’t take any chances,” Pete said, his mind going to Joe’s dependence on sleeping pills at night, especially when his OCD was acting up.   
“Okay. I really hope he hasn’t done anything.”

____

Andy wasn’t expecting to find Joe sitting on his bed with a handful of sleeping pills.   
“Joe!” Andy exclaimed out of fear and shock. Joe startled and turned to face him. “What’re you doing?”   
“Please, please just let me die,” Joe begged, still clutching the pills.   
“I can’t. I can’t let you die, baby,” Andy said. Tears slid out of Joe’s eyes. He shook his head violently and shoved the pills in his mouth.   
Andy lunged forward, grabbing his hands and forcing him to spit up the pills. Joe was sobbing, his bright blue eyes clouded with tears.   
Andy just held the other boy to his chest. He pressed kisses to the boy’s curly hair. They cried together until Mrs. Trohman came to check on them. She found them sobbing on Joe’s bed in front of a scattered mess of pills.  
Andy explained what had happened. Joe was still whimpering softly against his boyfriend’s chest.   
Andy gathered Joe in his arms, taking him into the bathroom to draw him a bath. Joe undressed slowly. His arms were folded tightly over his chest, trying to hide what he hated.   
Joe was trans and hated how he looked. He’d been out since seventh grade, and had met his friends when he was already seen as Joe.   
Andy helped him into the bathtub, and began washing his hair for him. Joe began crying again.   
“What happened, Joe?” Andy asked softly, running his hands through his boyfriend’s hair.   
“My- my dysphoria and OCD have just been so bad. I just wanna die, it would be so much better than being trapped in this body,” he cried. Andy’s heart dropped at Joe’s words.   
“Baby, it’s okay, you’ll be okay. I promise,” Andy whispered. “I love you.”  
Joe whispered an “I love you too” back to him.   
Eventually, Andy drained the tub and helped Joe dress in a pair of clean pajamas, and laid with him on his bed, holding him until he fell asleep.   
Andy was going to help Joe get better. He had to.


End file.
